Title: "LOST - Drabble/Ficlet 01"
Author: Hecate
Fandom: LOST
Rating: PG 13
Pairing, Character: Jack/Sawyer
Summary: Left alone with just a memory/Life seems dead and so unreal
Disclaimer: Not mine. No money made.
Note: Unbetaed.

Sawyer is gone, and Jack is on his way to get dynamite, following a crazy woman through the jungle, and hoping that they'll get out of this alive.

He imagines Sawyer dead as he walks through the green, he thinks of him dying on the raft, out there on the ocean, and Jack hates the idea now.

Sawyer is gone, and Jack wants to remember their fights, wants to remember punching him, screaming at him. But he can't, because Sawyer said goodbye and Sawyer told Jack about his father and everything is different now.

Jack thinks he'll miss Sawyer, knows he will, and it's surprising and new, and he'd like to blame it on Sawyer's confession. But it's more than that, it's their fights and punches and all the insults, and it's how alive Sawyer always made him feel. How much Sawyer didn't rely on him, how he didn't look at him like Jack was a leader or a hero.

Sawyer is his reality check, the reminder of the life on the other side of the ocean, and Jack feels the memories slipping without Sawyer's sharp tongue. He wonders if Locke is right. If the island is something special, if it changes them, reshapes them, and it seems to happen faster now.

He tells himself that he's still Jack, more than just a leader, but without Sawyer no one asks him to be anything else. Jack felt it before the raft left, when Sawyer wasn't around, when everybody expected him to solve problems and save them all. But Sawyer had always been close then, just an insult or a threat away, and it was so easy to find him and to be absolved for moments.

Sawyer saw Jack, and with Sawyer gone it's harder to remember who that is.